And I Will Continue to Smile
by Blooming Cosmo
Summary: Starfire is having deep thoughts about a certain Boy Wonder. R&R would be appreciated.


**MimiKitty:** Meh, haven't written in a while, hope I'm not that rusty xx. I at least hope that this isn't completely terrible. It's pretty short too, which is odd for me cause I like to write a lot. All well, hope you guys like. And if I didn't match the following character's persona correctly…I'm sorry, I tried .

**Disclaimer:** Obviously…if I owned TT I would be doing better things with my time. So, yes I don't own TT.

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And I Will Continue to Smile**  
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Her back rested comfortably on the soft purple comforters, feet resting on her pillows while her head dangled slightly off the edge of the bed. The door was in focus, upside down, but still in clear focus. It stood before her, the same as always, a metallic barrier that separated her from the others. It gave her the space she needed when she wished to be alone, and today was one of those days.

She was feeling this way for some time, each minute driving her to the point of insanity. At times, she even contemplated yanking her ruby locks from her head, hoping that the current feelings in her head would be replaced by the mass amounts of pain. Anything was better then what she was thinking.

It took her most of the day to think things through. She tried to match her feelings to different earth terms that she was now familiar with, and as she continued to stare at the door the word she was looking for seemed to narrow down. The word soon became clear to her and she yearned to say it out loud, almost as if the feel of the word on her tongue would make her feel better.

She closed her eyes, and her breathing slowed slightly, her chest rising and falling in a rhythmic pattern. She slowly allowed the air to fill and escape her lungs, and then she parted her lips to speak the words.

"You are...an enigma…" she spoke in a whisper, "The most complex creature I have ever had the chance to meet…" she said firmly.

She felt a certain sense of comfort as the words rolled off her tongue and wanted to continue to relish in this new zone of freedom. She wanted to continue voicing her mind, it was liberating.

"I have never been so affected by someone before," she muttered as she slowly brought herself up into a sitting position.

She turned her head slightly, so that her gaze was still on the door.

"And now…I am always scared…I do not know of the things that go on in your mind. I do not know your feelings, and I fear that I might lose you because of my foolishness. But…you would not leave me, would you? You never said you would, but you never said you would not. You care, correct? I care, does that even matter anymore? Why do you always…do this to me…?" she thought sadly, "I hate you…I hate you so much…" she said, her voice dripping with resentment, "I cannot stand what you do to me anymore. It is almost as if you play with my heart on purpose. Do you do it to get a good laugh? That cannot be…you hold me that way every time I am in need of rescuing. You speak with me so carefully, trying to help me understand things. Just the fact that you have not yet rejected me…has lead me to believe that I might still have a chance... And that makes me angry. You can so easily throw me away, but you have not, and I want to know, why? I do not want to be stuck in the dark anymore. I…I…want to know," she asked in total desperation.

Starfire carefully rolled on to her side and dangled her thin legs over the side of her bed. Pressing her feet on to the rug, she stood up and began to walk toward her door. She turned her back to it, leaning on it for support as she embraced her bare arms and continued on with her thoughts, "Robin…" she muttered slowly as she felt her knees slowly give in. Her body trailed down the length of the door until she was sitting on the floor, her hands on her knees, "If you do not want to tell me…I suppose I understand. But maybe…maybe one day you shall provide me with an answer. Hopefully, the answer I am looking for."

Her head bent back slightly to rest on the door, and she looked up almost hoping that he was listening to every word she was saying, "And if I must wait…I will wait patiently. I shall wait till the end of time if I must for your answer," she said as her lips curved up slightly. She let out a sigh shortly after, "And if you never give me an answer…I will still be here for you. You are very important to me Robin, so even if you never tell me…as long as you are happy I will try to be happy as well," she said trying to force a smile on her face.

"I will just continue smiling…for you…"


End file.
